Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me
If you kiss me, mister, I might tell my sister
If I tell her, mister, she might tell my mother
And my mother, mister, she might tell my father
And my father, mister, he won't be too happy
And he'll have his lawyer come up from the city
And arrest you, mister, so I wouldn't miss me
If you get me, mister - see?

Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me
If you kiss me, mister, you must think i'm pretty
If you think so, mister, you must want to fuck me
If you fuck me, mister, it must mean you love me
If you love me, mister, you would never leave me
It's as simple as can be!

Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me
If you miss me, mister, why do you keep leaving?
If you trick me, mister, I will make you suffer
And they'll get you, mister, put you in the slammer
And forget you, mister, then: you'll miss me, won't you?
Won't you miss me? Won't you miss me?!
WON'T YOU MISS ME?!

Missed me, missed me, now you gotta kiss me
If you kiss me, mister, take responsibility.
I'm fragile, mister, just like any girl would be,
And so misunderstood - so treat me delicately!

MISSED ME, MISSED ME!
Now you've gone and done it, hope you're happy
In the county penitentiary, it serves you right
For kissing little girls!
But I'll visit... If you miss me...

SAY YOU MISS ME!
(How's the food they feed you?)
Do you MISS ME?
(Will you kiss me through the window?)
DO YOU MISS ME?
MISS ME?
Will they ever let you go?
I miss my mister so...